[art by Can Pekdemir]

we are all just guessing the future and moving the stones, sifting through the augur’s entrails / But I know. I am blind and writhing the moments as we love, as we want, as they run through our fingers like water, palms full of gallons and moving towards the floor with the spice and wetness, the city is alive and crawling forward, the earth spinning and universe pushing outwards into the sky / it is eatery open past three and it is sandwich full of meat, chips and the forgotten cans of soda along the tables, I sit with friends and speak of past, choke on drinks meant for the birds, words meant for lovers, and right / the flash of my rings consumes them in the oil pastel of the deli lights / & I killed the hair in bleach to calm and trick, fool the aging, become the next person the self needed, become me and become new and shed the skin of this city, push it back and peel them all away / & I am terrified of my friends / I am sinking further into the mind / & I will flee at the end of summertime / to walk across the ocean & dream / on my own

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